


For as Long as We Have

by FoxBluereaver



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Anime), Pocket Monsters | Pokemon - All Media Types
Genre: Estrangement, Family, Family Drama, Father's Day, Father-Son Relationship, Reconciliation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-21
Updated: 2020-06-21
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:54:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24824893
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FoxBluereaver/pseuds/FoxBluereaver
Summary: After almost twenty years of absence, Ash's father comes to face his son. What was the reason he left, and why is he coming back now? It seems... he doesn't have much time left. Written for Father's Day.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 9





	For as Long as We Have

**_Vermillion City_** …

Ash Ketchum sighed. He wasn’t the kind of person who enjoyed to stay put at a specific place. He was more the type who was always on the move, searching for what he wanted rather than wait until it found him.

Which was the reason he was annoyed to be there, just standing and waiting. He’d left Pikachu and the rest of his Pokémon at the Pokémon Center, since they’d earned a break after such a long trip on the ship from Johto, and their last tournament in the Regional Champions League. In other circumstances, he’d gladly sought out a trainer to challenge them to a battle, if only to kill some time.

But he couldn’t get distracted. Thing was, as soon as he arrived to Vermillion City, he stopped by the Cerise Institute to say hi, just to find out somebody had come looking for him and left a message. What surprised him the most wasn’t the fact it was left in a traditional letter (though that was unusual), but who the sender was.

…

_ Dear Ash: _

_ You might be surprised to receive a message from me after so long, and even more when I’ve been completely absent from your life. And I can’t blame you if you don’t have a favorable opinion of me. _

_ Thing is, many things have happened, and now that I have the chance, I’d like it if we can talk to each other, even if it’s just once. I’d like to explain why I left, and why I never tried to return to you and Delia. Looking back now, I know I have no excuse for what I’ve done, but if you’re going to hate me, at least I want to be sure I deserve it. _

_ I’m not asking for more, just one or two hours of your time. If you accept, could we meet at the Vermillion plaza about at about ten o’clock tomorrow? _

_ Your father,  _

_ Jaycen Ketchum. _

**_ P.S: _ ** _ If you have any doubts, you can ask your mother. I’ve talked to her about it. _

…

And so he did. As soon as he read the letter, first thing to do was to phone home at Pallet Town, and Delia confirmed that, indeed, it was from his father. Ash would have almost wished it was just a very bad joke.

“My father… he shows up after all these years, just like that?”

His father had been absent from his life since he could remember, and in fact, back at home there were very few photos of him. He wasn’t sure he could recognize him now, even with a look. As far as he knew, one day he simply left home, and Delia didn’t want to talk about it.

And now, all of a sudden, he got a letter from him, saying that he wanted to meet with him, if only once. Approaching his twenties now, Ash wasn’t sure what a man who left his family for so long could want, and truth be told, he himself wasn’t sure why he felt the urge to agree.

Maybe it was because his mother asked him, with a strong sense of urgency:

…

“ _I know you’re not happy with your father, but you shouldn’t hold grudges without knowing everything. Give him at least this chance to talk, that’s all he’s asking of you.”_

…

Those were Delia’s words when he called her. Ash read and reread his father’s letter, wondering what could be that thing he needed to know. He wasn’t one to hold grudges, but… he wasn’t sure his father could have had any good reasons to leave their lives without a trace, either.

He didn’t know what to do. His mom was asking it of him, and from the way she said it, there was something she knew and he (Ash) did not. And the only way to find out was to talk to his father.

And that was the feeling that didn’t leave him alone. On the one hand, he almost wished he’d skipped that stop at Cerise’s labs and head straight for Pallet Town, even though that probably would have only delayed the message. On the other hand… something inside told him that, if he refused, he’d never forgive himself.

In the end the latter choice won out, and here he was now. He couldn’t back off now, so he might just get it over with as soon as possible.

Almost a minute after the plaza’s clock hit ten, Ash saw someone walking towards him. Even though he walked with his back to the sun and couldn’t see his face, he quickly took notice that the guy was wearing an outfit similar to his own: a red baseball cap, a dark blue jacket and a pair of black pants, though he wore boots instead of running shoes. He walked nonchalantly with his hands in his pockets, as if knowing exactly where he was going.

And when the man stopped in front of Ash, the trainer could see him clearly. The same messy black hair, albeit a bit longer under the neck, and the same Z-shaped marks as Ash. Even though the beard he didn’t have on the photos and the eye bags evidenced the passing of time, and he also looked a bit paler than in the photos, there was no doubt it was him.

“Hi, son,” he greeted, trying to smile. “I’m very glad to see you.”

“Hi… Dad,” Ash replied. He didn’t feel he could answer the second statement sincerely, so he said no more.

“I know this won’t be easy for you,” Jaycen said. “But my time is limited, and I think it’s best we talk as soon as possible.”

“That’s good for me, the sooner, the better,” Ash said. “Should we go somewhere quiet?”

…

Father and son went to a small cafeteria. There wasn’t a lot of people at the moment, so they could talk without interruptions, while also eating something. Jaycen offered to pay the bill, but Ash replied he had his own money to pay for his meal.

After the aperitif, they finally started talking.

“I’ve been following your achievements closely, you know?” Jaycen began, and Ash couldn’t help but notice the tinge of pride in his voice. “Saw your last battle in the Regional Champions League, you were incredible.”

“Thanks,” Ash replied. “So, what have you done in all this time? Something interesting?”

“Not much, to be honest,” Jaycen admitted. “Thing have been… a tad complicated for me.”

“Complicated?” Ash raised an eyebrow. “Was that why you left without telling Mom or me a word?”

Ash noticed his father looked away uncomfortably. He’d agreed to talk to him to clear things up, though looking back now, that was a bit blunt of him.

“Ash, you have no idea how much I regret leaving you. I was young and stupid; I wasn’t thinking clearly…”

The trainer reined himself in from making a comment. Young? How old was Jaycen then? Twenty, twenty-two? There wasn’t much difference with Ash’s current age, and he’d grown very independent himself. His career didn’t force him to leave his family.

“Mom suffered a lot, you know? When I asked her why you were gone, she never answered. Sometimes, I even heard her cry at night,” Ash added.

Jaycen shut his eyes tightly, frowning in discomfort again. It seemed like he already knew that, but Ash needed to say it, no matter how much it hurt. He needed to understand what he made them go through.

“I assure you, I never meant to cause you pain,” Jaycen said. “I know I should have done this before, but I want to take care of my unfinished business while I still have time.”

Before Ash could ask what he meant by ‘while I still have time’, Jaycen pulled from his jacket a folder full of papers. Ash checked them out and realized they were from Kanto’s National Bank.

A fund placed to Ash and Delia’s name, and it had quite the amount. Maybe enough to remodel their house and restaurant, with still having plenty to spare.

“You think money will make up for all these years you left?” Ash said. “Mom and I are well off. So thanks anyway, but we don’t need your money.”

“Neither will I,” Jaycen replied. “I’d rather leave it in good hands. And I have nobody else but you two.”

“What’s wrong with you?” Ash asked, starting to feel annoyed. “I’d almost think you’re dying and writing down your will, or something.”

Jaycen didn’t answer verbally, but his gesture after Ash’s remark didn’t go unnoticed. In fact, the silence itself was all the answer the trainer needed.

“Wait… don’t tell me you…?”

“To be frank, I’m not certain how much time I have left,” Jaycen said nonchalantly. “That’s why I want to leave everything in order, so I can leave without regrets.”

Jaycen pulled another folder, of a different color. More intrigued than before, Ash took it and opened it, finding a lot of paper with terms a graphs he didn’t understand. Still, he knew enough to tell they were medical exams, more specifically from the heart. Cardiograms, wasn’t that what they were called?

However, what got his attention was the space describing the patient’s condition.

“Osiris Syndrome?”

“It’s a terminal illness,” Jaycen explained. “There is no known cure, just treatments to alleviate symptoms and slow down its progress. When I was first diagnosed, they didn’t give me more than four or five years.”

“When was that?” Ash asked.

“… Shortly after you were born,” Jaycen confessed, his tone full of shame.

Ash dropped the folder on the table, shocked at the revelation. Everything came too fast to process it. First, his father showed up unannounced to see him after almost twenty years, then, it turned out he was afflicted with a terminal illness, and wanted to fix things with him while he still had time.

The part of Ash that was still bitter at his father now entered in conflict with the other, the one saying he couldn’t simply ask him to go away after revealing his condition. Nevertheless, there were still some things to clear up.

“But you’re here now,” Ash pointed out. “You said they didn’t give you more than four or five years.”

“It’s an experimental treatment, but it’s effective. It’s not like I have hopes for a cure, but it helps me alleviate the worst parts.”

Jaycen rolled up a sleeve to show him a device on his wrist. It vaguely reminded Ash of the bracelet Clemont had used to monitor his synch rate with Greninja. The beeping was synched to a graph of his cardiac rhythm, along with other vital signs gauges.

“If I take care and keep the therapy, I might still have about six more years. Or six months. For all I know it could be just six minutes.”

“You talk like someone who’s resigned himself to die,” Ash said with annoyance. He didn’t like that attitude one bit.

“I’m just trying to be realistic,” Jaycen replied. “I figured that, if my time’s limited, I could do something good out of my life. It’ll help other people who have this illness in the future.”

Ash didn’t deny that was a noble goal, but still didn’t like that attitude of resignation from his father. It looked like he’d just given up without at least trying to do something about it, as minuscule his hopes were.

Neither did he understand what that had to do with leaving him and Delia.

“Did Mom know?” Ash asked. “She never told me anything.”

“Now she does,” Jaycen emphasized. “I didn’t have the courage to tell her then. I guess… I didn’t want to tie her to a dying man.”

“She could have done something. You shouldn’t have carried that burden alone.”

“Says the boy who’s carried the weight of the world in his shoulders? Several times?” Jaycen replied in an amused tone. “Yeah, don’t think I’m not up to speed with your craziest adventures, young hero.”

“That was a low blow, Dad. Besides, I was never alone. I always had my friends, and my Pokémon to support me.”

“But that doesn’t change that you tried to do things alone, so others wouldn’t be in danger, didn’t you?”

Ash frowned, but he was unable to reply. His father had nailed it: while he wasn’t averse to accept help, sometimes he tried to carry the burdens alone, only to fail pretty badly.

Suddenly, his father’s expression shifted, and his smile vanished with it.

“I guess that’s something we share… we don’t want anybody else to carry our burdens.”

Ash looked into Jaycen’s eyes. He didn’t consider himself as ‘responsible’ in the strict sense of the word, but for important things, and whenever he took something as a duty to fulfill, he clearly wouldn’t let anybody take it from him.

“After I left, I wandered around aimlessly,” Jaycen continued. “During that time, all I wanted was that the pain would end. No, I’m not talking about my illness. I’m talking about the pain of leaving you and Delia.”

“Then why did you do it?” Ash asked. “Were you ashamed of having that illness?”

“No, it wasn’t that,” Jaycen shook his head. “It was because… I was afraid you’d suffer because of me.”

“Me?”

“Osiris Syndrome is hereditary. More common in men than women, and from what I learned, if was a 50/50 chance with you. To think I had passed my condition to an innocent child… that thought always tormented me. Until I couldn’t take it anymore.”

Ash balled his fists, which started to shake. All that time, his father had been absent from his life. For years, Ash wondered what could have prompted him to leave him and his mother. He just couldn’t understand why he had left. He imagined a myriad of reasons: maybe he was stuck in something dangerous, maybe he eloped with another woman, and he even came to believe he could have had some kind of accident.

He never imagined the real reason was a terminal illness. Or the possibility that he (Ash) could have it. Not that he saw it as justifiable… but he found himself unable to hate him for it.

Right then, the trainer recalled something else.

“Wait, shortly before I came back from Johto, mom asked me to take a blood sample and send it to him. Was that…?”

“For a DNA test,” Jaycen confirmed. “To determine your chances of developing Osiris Syndrome. No need to worry, though; Delia told me the results were 100% negative.”

Well, that was a relief. The thought of carrying an illness all these years and not knowing about it, that was chilling.

The trainer remained silent, trying to assimilate everything his father told him. Why he left, his illness, his fear of passing it down to his son… he really didn’t know what to make of all that.

“Listen, I’m not going to force you and Delia to accept me again after all this time,” Jaycen said. “I made a grave mistake and I can’t change that. If you want me to disappear from your lives so I won’t torment you, I will. It’s not like I’ll be able to stay here in the long run, anyway.”

“How can you be so sure about that?” Ash asked. “Are you giving up that easily? You thought you’d live only four or five years, yet here you are, aren’t you?”

“Ash, please understand, even the therapy can’t extend my life forever,” Jaycen said.

“So what?” Ash protested, raising his voice. “You’re just resigned to die, as if you had nothing left to live for? Why don’t you try to use the time you have, to _live_ it, instead of running away?”

Jaycen’s eyes widened at Ash’s declaration. He seemed ready to reply again, but stopped. The boy knew he’d hit the bullseye, so he kept pressing on.

“Never thought I’d say this, but I’m not angry at you for leaving us anymore,” Ash said. “I’m angry because you seem to be afraid of living. You might still be breathing, but it’s like you’re dead inside. And I don’t like that one bit.”

“Ash…”

“Maybe I can’t forgive you for leaving us, not now,” the boy continued. “But I can try, if you help me. Even if it’s just for some time… can’t you at least _try_ to be my father?”

Ash would hate to admit it, but the absence of a father figure in his life was a void he always carried inside. Sure, he had Professor Oak as a sort of surrogate grandfather, but it wasn’t the same. And for Delia it wasn’t easy to fulfill the role of both parents in his life.

He didn’t deny it; he was angry at his father, but he didn’t want to have that feeling. He wanted to be able to forgive him, to leave the bitterness behind, and if Jaycen vanished from their lives, either because he left again or ended up dying, Ash would never forgive himself for it.

“Even after all this time, I never stopped thinking about you two,” Jaycen said. “In fact, after Delia I never was with anybody else. Partly because I didn’t want to pass my illness to another child… and partly because I still love her despite all this.”

For the first time, Jaycen’s tone was hopeful rather than resigned. Maybe, Ash could appeal to that to get that attitude off of him.

“Then why don’t you try it? As far as I know, Mom never divorced you,” Ash said. “Neither did she consider you dead or something.”

Even though Delia didn’t like talking about it, sometimes when she thought Ash wasn’t looking, he saw her staring at the photos where they were together. Had she wanted to, she could have easily stored them away, or even trashed them, yet she didn’t. That meant that, at least a part of her was hopeful that things would go back as they used to be.

“It won’t be easy. For any of us.”

“Important things are never easy,” Ash replied. “I should know.”

Obviously, things couldn’t go back as they used to be. But that didn’t mean they couldn’t be a family again.

Father and son stared into each other’s eyes. Ash wouldn’t back off, not even a little. He agreed to talk to his father and fix things with him. At first, he had no idea how things would turn out, but now he had the full context, he knew very well what they had to do.

* * *

**_A couple weeks later…_ **

Pallet Town’s Battle Coliseum was packed. Even though it was just an exhibition match, not every day you had the chance to watch two of the strongest Kanto Battle Frontier Brains facing against each other, and the match was about to reach its climax.

“Regirock, Stone Edge!”

“Charizard, defend with Steel Wing!”

The stone titan raised its arms, summoning from earth several chunks of sharp stone, and with a pushing gesture sent them flying at its foe. The winged lizard, for his part, landed on the ground, holding on with his talons, while his wings took on a metallic glow and he closed them on himself to use them as a shield.

The battle had been fierce; both Ash and Brandon had been left with a single Pokémon and they were both exhausted. It would all come down to one last attack.

“Charizard, keep up the Steel Wing and use Flame Charge!” Ash shouted.

“Fire Zap Cannon, now!” Brandon countered.

The flame on Charizard’s tail grew in size, quickly engulfing his entire body, while Regirock put its arms together to form a large electric sphere. Regirock hurled his attack first, but Charizard flew like a fire meteor, extending his wings like blades. A second later, he pierced through the sphere, and then Regirock, leaving a metallic flash in his wake.

Charizard landed on the other side of the field, giving off sparks that evidenced paralysis after taking the Zap Cannon head on. But right then, a large cut appeared on the stone golem’s body, who then slumped heavily on the ground, sealing the match.

“Regirock is unable to battle! The winner of the match is the Coliseum Gladiator, Ash Ketchum!”

Immediately, the whole crowd went wild in cheering, as both trainers returned their Pokémon and met each other in the middle of the field, to congratulate each other on a great match.

Meanwhile, the VIP box had only two seats occupied; namely, by the parents of one of the two combatants. It was one of the perks of their son being the host and owner of that place, so he could always give them admission with the best seats.

“So?” Delia asked. “What do you think?”

“Wow,” Jaycen replied. “I had seen his matches on TV many times, but… seeing them in person is something else, really.”

“I know.” The woman nodded. “Ash has grown quite a bit in this time, and he never fails to surprise me.”

“Now more than ever, I regret not having been there to see him grow.”

The man glanced at his wife, who returned the look it with compassion. He was very grateful to her, for waiting for him after so long. Even more for raising their son to become such a great man.

“The past is the past now.” Delia held his hand. “What matters now is that you’re back in our lives.”

“Are you sure? I told you, I’m not sure how much time I have left. And I don’t want you to suffer because of me.”

“It doesn’t matter. You already know, but Ash had many close calls with death before, and that terrifies me. But when I think about it, he lives every moment to the fullest, so he won’t have any regrets. You could follow his example.”

Jaycen glanced at his son on the battlefield again. During all that time, he was so afraid of his illness, or having passed it down to Ash, that he didn’t realize he was also afraid of living his own life. And had he continued down that path, he’d probably have gone regretting everything he didn’t do in that period.

“For as long as we have, I will live. For you, and for Ash,” Jaycen said. “I don’t want to have any more regrets.”

Delia smiled at him, and he felt relieved. Even if it wasn’t too long, staying with them sounded better than running away. There were so many things he wanted to do, and say. Maybe he couldn’t get to do all of them, but sure as hell he’d get to do as many as possible.

Like for example…

“By the way… do you know if Ash’s gotten himself a girlfriend?” he asked Delia with curiosity.

“Oh, we have to introduce her to you one day,” Delia said, winking. “I’m sure you’ll love her as much as I do when you get to know her.”

Jaycen smiled at that. He hoped his son had good taste in women. After all, no father could waste waste the chance to embarrass his son in front of his girlfriend at least once in his life.

**_FIN._ **

**Author's Note:**

> Hey again, people! Okay, so, first things first and let’s clear up some stuff: first, this oneshot is NOT a sequel or prequel of the one I wrote for Mother’s Day with Delia and Misty, it’s in a different continuity. Second, while I’m technically using the same character with Jaycen, it’s also not in the same line as the one I made long ago: “You Are my Father, I Am Your Son”. Here I just gave him a different reason to leave. And third… I’m not going to specify who’s Ash’s girlfriend here. Could be Misty, could be Serena… heck, could even be Angie, or Anabel. You guys decide XD
> 
> Point is, I’m eager to test different versions of why Ash’s father could have left, without going into the typical clichés of making him Giovanni, Red from the games, etc. I took the basis here for the subplot with Remus Lupin in the final Harry Potter book, after he leaves Tonks and their unborn child out of fear of passing down his lycanthropy. To avoid complications, I simply picked up a fictional disease: Osiris Syndrome comes from the series Mirai Sentai Timeranger, though the details are unspecified beyond it apparently being cardiac (the Blue Ranger has it and tries to keep it hidden from the others). Histories where the topic of Ash’s father is touched very rarely try to find more “human” motives to explain his absence, and that’s my intention with this shot. I still haven’t got a definitive headcanon, which is why I’m testing different versions. Of course, I’m not planning on taking 100% the line of Shudo’s novels.
> 
> Anyway, I guess I don’t have anything else to say. Happy day to all fathers out there (especially mine, wherever he is right now) and I hope you guys enjoyed this shot. See you next time!


End file.
